Why can't I get a sponsor like this?

I saw this, and I just couldn't resist.

Energy Drink

Privacy

Come on folks, you wouldn’t want these people in your bedrooms. Don’t support these guys. Stay away from the websites, don’t buy nothing, and don’t watch that trash. That said, there’s better ways of handling them then smackin’ em around. You gotta learn to be responsible with your strength and not always run acting on reflexes.